mychildfeels.com » Empathy

Ask Jennifer Kolari: Hearing Loss and Tantrums

jenniferkolari — Mon, 18 Oct 2010 13:00:36 +0000

My son just turned 4 and we have recently discovered that he may be hard of hearing. There has been a lot of activity lately around him regarding this discovery. He has always been a bit of a hot tempered boy but just this past week it has seemed to escalate to him getting in your face and growling, stomping feet and throwing things. Could this be due to all the “medical” issues going on around him lately? What is the best way to handle this? We do our best to talk calmly and take him to a quiet space to help him calm down but is this the best way?

- S.

It’s important to remember that many kids at the age of four behave exactly this way even without any other compounding issues. I am sure part of his frustration does have to do with the stress of being carted around to different appointments but part of your sons frustration may also come from the fact that like most four year old’s, he has many more words in his head than he can actually get out, especially if he has missed some information due to his hearing difficulties.

When he is frustrated it is even harder to find those words and express them. This is typical for children around three and four years old and means that it is much easier to grab, stomp or throw things than to say them. This will most likely decrease as his hearing issues are addressed and his language develops.

In the meantime it is important to deal with these behaviors. Behaviors hang around if they are useful so somehow the yelling and throwing things is serving some purpose for him. It may be that he’s upset so he wants you to be upset too. It may be that at least some of the time it has paid off and he has ended up getting what he wanted. In order to stop certain behaviors you have to be neutral, calm and very consistent.

If you are using the naughty chair then after asking him to say things in a nice way and after you have shown him that you understand he is frustrated, tell him that if he continues to speak to you in that way he will have him sit on the chair for two or three minutes every time. Do this calmly and do it every time he speaks to you in this manner. Try not to shame him and you don’t have to lecture or have a big talk when going to the chair or when the sitting time is over, just go back to business as usual like it never happened.

The key is to repeat this over and over again as an interruption so he learns it actually is worth taking the time to think about his words. Balance this with lots of cuddles and kisses and you should see this behavior disappear in less than two weeks. Good luck.

Jennifer Kolari is a regular contributor of mychildfeels.com with her feature, "Ask Jennifer Kolari". You can read her Connected Parenting Blog and visit her at www.connectedparenting.com for more information.

Guest Blog: Should We Protect Our Kids From Difficult Situations?

marshajacobson — Wed, 15 Sep 2010 19:14:08 +0000

I’d like to welcome Shara Lawrence-Weiss as a guest blogger on mychildfeels.com. Shara operates a great informational website called, “Early Childhood News and Resources.”

Raising children is not easy, especially in difficult times. It is during these times that honesty becomes so important. Say what you mean and mean what you say because children “hear” our non-verbal communication as loudly as our verbal conversation. Shara suggests that rather than shield our children during times like these that we engage them and teach them coping skills to help them become successful adults.

Thanks for the insight Shara!

Marsha

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Should we protect our kids from difficult circumstances?

In my parent’s generation it was understood that children should be kept from hearing, or seeing, difficult situations: financial, marriage, family, etc. Our parents did this in an attempt to keep our hearts from breaking. They wanted to protect us.

With protection, however, comes a bit of head burial. Much like an Ostrich with his head in the sand. The difficult circumstances still exist but the Ostrich cannot see them – temporarily. When the head is pulled out of the sand, though, the aftermath of the circumstances may well bring a bit of shock to the poor fellow.

What? Huh? What happened to my food? It was right there, just a moment ago!

Parenting could well be viewed this way, also: if we attempt to protect our children from every difficult situation, they might be left wondering: “What the heck happened? How do I deal with this NOW?”

Consider the following hypothetical situation:

Mom: Your father is upset because it’s been a long day. He’s just tired. Everything is fine. Go to bed now and tomorrow will be a new day! You’re fine right? Good night, kiddo. Love you!

Child: But…I know something is wrong. I can feel it. I can sense it. Dad used to be more laid back and easy going. Have I done something wrong? Why does he hate me now? What can I do to make it right?

Now consider this hypothetical situation:

Mom: Hey, kiddo. We know you are wondering what’s going on. We’ll be honest with you. Your dad lost his job this week. The company downsized and several daddies were left wondering what to do. It’s not easy for your dad right now. He feels as though he’s let us all down. We may need to reconsider how we’ve been spending money and I might need to get another job for a while. That will cause some stress on the family but we’re going to work hard to be positive, have faith that everything will work out, and keep the lines of communication open. We’ll plan a fun day out, together, soon – like a picnic at the park. This won’t be easy but we’ll pull through. We always do.

Child: This makes sense. Of course dad is feeling bad and now I get it. I’m glad it wasn’t me or anything I did. Yeah – let’s go to the park soon!

By giving our children the skills needed to talk through situations, we’ll help them for the short term and for the long term. No family (single parent, two parent, or otherwise) gets through life without any difficult circumstances. This is not logical or feasible.

The key is to demonstrate an ability to communicate, feel, empathize and work through the difficult times. If our children see that hard times come, yes – but can be worked through as a team – they’ll be ready for successful adulthood.

About the Author:

Shara Lawrence-Weiss is the owner of Mommy Perks, Personal Child Stories, Early Childhood News and Resources and Kids Perks. She has a background in education, early childhood, nanny work, published freelance, marketing and special needs.

Marsha Jacobson is author of "Boom... Boom... Boom...: A Story to Raise Your Child's Emotional Intelligence". She is a regular contributor of mychildfeels.com and you can visit her website at marshajacobson.com .

The Me In Parenting

marshajacobson — Tue, 29 Jun 2010 20:57:20 +0000

I was undiagnosed, but in retrospect clearly diagnosable, with depression from age 12. For much of my youth I “other-reflected” rather than self-reflected. I made the worst attitudes of others my own. I would say that I hated the way others viewed my depression but I really just hated myself. Through necessity born from the passing of time, I came to acceptance. But it wasn’t until I had children and became aware of the “me” in that relationship that I grew to know myself better. From that knowledge, I learned to love myself.

Every parent has issues – so while I speak from mine, I think what I have learned can be generalized.

Spontaneity is a wonderful attribute in many aspects of life but not so much in parenting. Awareness, consciousness, thoughtfulness and openness are characteristics that I have come to value in the parenting process. Without these, we parent reactively rather than actively. What does this mean? As parents we are sometimes confused between the discrepancy between what we want and what is.

We feel that we have tried our best and in that moment, we truly have. So what can we do to aim for better? We need to focus less on our reactions to a particular situation and more on why we react in that way. We have to become self-psychologists. What thoughts and beliefs do we have? Where do they come from? Did our parents have them too? Are they serving us? If not, can we change them?

Here’s a simple example: I am watching my 3 year old daughter eat her dinner. It’s spaghetti and meat sauce. Within minutes, the sauce is more on her face than in her mouth. I reach for a napkin and wipe her face. She screams and pushes me away. I reprimand her and persevere amidst crying. I feel angry that she does not allow me to do what is necessary in this situation.

These are the questions I needed to ask myself, “What is my belief here? Why is it important that her face be clean? Where does this belief come from? Why am I angry?” I realize that I hear my mother’s voice telling me the importance of being clean and that my anger comes from my daughter’s lack of compliance, as well as my feelings of frustration and incompetence.

My belief here is that a good parent is one who can get their child to listen. Knowing these things allows me to choose. I may decide that a clean face is in fact unimportant and thus avoid this particular conflict. If I feel that I need that clean face, I may approach the solution a little differently without the power struggle born from my belief about parenting. For example, I could hand a napkin to my daughter and say, “Here’s a napkin, sweetheart. You can use it if you want to wipe your face.”

Knowledge of the self in parenting is power.

In my early days of parenting, I was a reactive parent. If my children showed any signs of anxiety or sadness, I would react with great personal anxiety believing that this was because of my concern for my child. This reaction did not serve my child or myself. Once I learned to look at what I brought to the parenting table, I was able to recognize that their anxiety was triggering my own fears. This understanding allowed me to remove a cloud from between myself and my child and see him more objectively.

To this day, if I feel that I am particularly anxious in a parenting moment, I will stop and ask myself, “What about this situation is making me feel this way?” This contemplation makes me look at myself and makes me a much more effective parent.

The parenting relationship is complex. Every parenting moment is a mesh of personalities and beliefs from both parent and child. Practicing conscious parenting allows us to take ownership of what belongs to us. This enables us to see our child with greater clarity and to parent with greater empathy.

Guest Blog: Helping Young Children Who Speak Different Languages Become Friends

marshajacobson — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 14:00:52 +0000

It gives me great pleasure to welcome Karen Nemeth to mychildfeels.com. I met Karen over Twitter (follow her @KarenNemethEdM) and she was kind enough to write a guest blog.

In the multicultural societies of North America, tolerance and kindness towards others begins in the cradle. Karen has some wonderful and helpful suggestions on how to create an environment conducive to these attributes. Karen is the author of “Many Languages, One Classroom: Teaching Dual and English Language Learners” (2009) and has her Masters degree in education. Thanks Karen for providing us with your great perspective. – Marsha

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Children from different home languages are the fastest growing segment of the preschool population right now across the United States. Chances are most English-speaking children will meet children who speak other languages in their neighborhoods, schools and childcare. We can all benefit from fostering attitudes of tolerance and friendship.

Research tells us that all preschool children need to continue learning in their home languages even while they are also ready and able to learn a second language. My hope is that all young children can learn to make wonderful social and emotional connections regardless of language, culture or ability.

I’ve included a lot of suggestions for helping diverse children communicate in my book, “Many Languages, One Classroom: Teaching Dual and English Language Learners” (2009, Gryphon House). Here are some practical strategies that you can use to help young children get along with their diverse friends:

Be a language learning role model: Research shows there are cognitive advantages to becoming bilingual. Even more important, this is a great way to show that you respect and enjoy diversity of languages and cultures and you are willing to give it a try. Help children get beyond their shyness about trying to pronounce unfamiliar words. And, above all, learn to properly pronounce every child’s name because it is an extension of their identity!
Narrate children’s play: This helps bridge the communication gap by giving the English speaking children clues about how they can understand their new friend and by providing new vocabulary and understanding for the English language learner. You might say, “Oh, Tomika is reaching for the blue play dough. I think she is making a snake. Ryan, you want to use some blue play dough too? Let’s see how we can help Tomika understand how fun it is to share playdough with a friend!”
Teach everyone to use “motherese”: Even preschool-aged children can use these time-tested techniques to build basic language. Remind all the children to speak slowly, to use gestures, expressions, props and pointing, to emphasize key words, and to be patient as they look for signs their friend has understood their message.
Assign language buddies: Establishing a buddy system guarantees that every child will have a ready-made friend to start with. Depending on who is available and what are the language levels and needs of each child, think of different ways to pair children. You might ask a more experienced bilingual child to partner with a newcomer, or pair a nurturing English-speaker with a child who is just learning the language. This benefits the newcomer for sure – but think about how terrific it is for the other buddy to be entrusted with such important responsibility!
Prepare adults to foster multilingual friendships: Sometimes programs or playgroups may have one adult who speaks the other language of the children. That’s a wonderful thing – but even better if that adult is prepared to include other friends in the play, stories and games. Every monolingual English child should have the experience of participating in play that is conducted in a language they hardly know.
Try using sign language: Using American Sign Language (ASL) in the U.S., and other versions in their respective locations, is a fantastic addition to any preschool child’s life. Many of the signs used by young children really do look like the concept, so they are easy to remember and use. For example, the sign for ‘drink’ is to hold the hand as if gripping a cup and putting it to the lips. As long as we depend on using gestures to augment our communication – why not use standard signs as gestures? Then all the children will be learning the same gestures to clarify communication even if the group has many different languages. I’ve seen children rush to teach signs to newcomers so they can get to know each other right away.

I know there’s a lot of talk among advocates and experts about how important it is for American children to learn to communicate with people from different language and cultural background to support our country’s ability to compete in the global marketplace. Right now, I am most interested in helping young children develop confidence, self-esteem, and the joy of being able to make new friends!

Karen Nemeth, Ed.M. is an instructor at Bucks County Community College in Pennsylvania. She is also a consultant and website developer (www.languagecastle.com) on supporting dual and English language learners in early childhood education. She is the author of “Many Languages, One Classroom: Teaching Dual and English Language Learners” (2009, Gryphon House). She is a writer and consulting editor for NAEYC and is the Early Childhood Special Interest Group co-coordinator on the board of NJTESOL-NJBE.

Too Much Parenting Advice?

marshajacobson — Wed, 06 Jan 2010 14:00:43 +0000

Mackenzie Carpenter of the Washington Post writes a thought provoking article entitled, “Clashing Data Bombards New Parents As Old-School Ideas Fall By The Wayside.”

Giving readers food for thought, Carpenter talks about parents over-reliance on parent advice. She cleverly points out how advice and parenting gurus change from generation to generation, leading us to wonder at the validity of any of it.

While I could be buying into yet another trend, I do feel that raising your children to be emotionally intelligent by using principles of emotional coaching, empathy and mirroring really makes sense. This approach individualizes parenting and puts the power back where it belongs – the parent-child relationship.

In my opinion, no one parenting book or one parenting guru can be useful unless it recognizes this individualistic approach. When we, as parents, feel in charge of our parenting it does much to reduce the anxiety of feeling like we are always falling short. Reading many conflicting books on parenting will raise this anxiety, sometimes to a feverish pitch.

I’m not suggesting that we should feel like we are always right! Parenting is a dynamic relationship in which we learn. We have to make mistakes because we are human. Let’s learn from these.

A Wonderful Letter to Grade 5 Students

marshajacobson — Mon, 04 Jan 2010 14:00:15 +0000

My daughter Gabi has been at school for 5 months now. I finally got around to asking her homeroom teacher whether I could share a wonderful introductory letter she gave students on the first day of class. This is truly a letter worth sharing.

It is thoughtful on so many levels. It’s relevant to the children, speaking about TV shows and games that they were all familiar with. It immediately sets the tone of humanness, speaking of a range of feelings. It demonstrates, by example, exactly what will be expected from the children.

In my experience, teachers often will “talk the talk” but somehow lose the connection between what they preach and how they act. My daughter is happy in this class. She feels heard, comfortable and motivated. This is thanks to a teacher who understands children and lets them know! This letter defines emotional intelligence. Enjoy!

Dear Grade Five Students,

Welcome to grade 5! If you are a little bit nervous about starting a new class, I know how you feel! I am a little bit nervous too.

When I want to have fun I hang out with my husband, my friends and my daughters. We love to watch “So You Think You Can Dance,” play games like Guitar Hero and Rock Band or bike ride. I am looking forward to the new Beatle Rock Band! In the summer I love camping in Algonquin Park, travelling to Pittsburgh to watch my daughter play soccer and going to art shows.

If you saw me in elementary school, you might think I was a snob. I used to be very, very shy and I would not talk to people until I got to know them. Then, watch out! Once I got to know you, I would talk your ear off! I was always the smallest one in the class but I loved sports and was faster and stronger than anyone.

I think school should be a place where everyone feels safe and able to learn. School should be a place where students and teachers learn from each other. This year I hope to learn as much from all of you as you learn from me.

I feel proud when I know I have done my very best work and when I do something to help another person. I really get angry when people are cruel or unkind to others. I think our four class agreements are very important and will help create a ‘safe’ learning environment for all of us this year.

I am looking forward to hearing about each of you! Please write me back.

Sincerely,

Mrs. S

No Place For Power Struggles In Parenting

marshajacobson — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 18:56:59 +0000

We’ve all been there and often don’t know how we arrived. But one thing is certain, no parent enjoys being in a power struggle with their child. What brings us to this point?

Parenting is not a one way street. Two separate personalities interact to hopefully produce a loving parent-child relationship. Becoming a good parent is as much about us as it is about our kids. We have to understand our beliefs, emotions and our own “parented” experience. Not only that, we have to process all of this so that we parent consciously and not reactively.

Here’s an example: Tim is 15 years old. He has shut himself in his room, barely communicates and has even gone so far as to put a sign on his door which says, “Keep Out!” This can be hard to deal with especially for parents who believe that children should always listen or for parents who have problems with not being liked. This can feel impossible and they may react in anger, creating a power struggle which resolves very little.

Parents who take the time to recognize their feelings may be more able to react by saying to themselves, “This is a tough situation for me and it evokes all these feelings. This self-acknowledement creates consciousness and we are much more able to show empathy to our child. It may allow us to see that our teenager is seeking independence and separation.” Understanding allows for compassion and empathy which are two attributes important in parenting and never more so than in parenting teenagers!

Does this mean that before becoming a parent we should all go into therapy? (In truth, it probably wouldn’t hurt!) It does mean is that parents should think about parenting from a personal perspective. Become aware of the issues that you bring to the parent-child relationship. Sometimes knowing what your issues are allows you to react differently even if you have not resolved those issues. Taking responsibility for who you are adds a layer to parenting by increasing consciousness.

We are all human however, so be prepared for mistakes. We learn from our mistakes! And they’re not always set in stone. An apology goes a long way, both in correcting a parenting mistakes and in teaching our kids that it’s ok to make mistakes and to apologize.

Avoiding power struggles does not mean soft parenting. Children need to know that their parents are in charge and their protectors. Be in charge. Just don’t be there for the wrong reasons.

Ask Jennifer Kolari: Childhood Anxiety

jenniferkolari — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 17:41:39 +0000

One of the more common questions and issues I deal with in my therapy practice is about childhood anxiety.

All of us have anxiety – it is an important emotion.

We need it to survive, stay safe and make good choices. Some of us are hardwired to be more anxious than others. As a therapist, I feel that more and more children are struggling with anxiety for many reasons and many parents struggle with how to help their kids cope. We want to make sure our children control their anxiety so it doesn’t control them. We don’t want their worries and fears to get in the way of enjoying and participating fully in their lives.

As parents it can be very difficult to help an anxious child. We often resort to reasoning with them and trying to use logic to talk them out of these irrational feelings. Unfortunately, this can just makes things worse. Once the brain is anxious for a certain amount of time it begins to organizes itself around that and remain in fight or flight mode for longer periods. An anxious brain does not always respond very well to rationale and the child often becomes more invested in convincing you how scary a situation really is. Children can also widen their repertoire of things to be frightened of, leaving parents baffled and swinging between feeling empathy and frustration.

Children don’t always show the typical or obvious signs of anxiety that we might think of. Sometimes demanding behaviour, extreme bossiness, temper tantrums and sleep disturbances can all be symptoms of worry or anxiety.

Here’s what to do:

Talk to Your Child’s Doctor. If you feel your child’s anxiety is regularly getting in the way of them enjoying their life, if they constantly have trouble sleeping or complain often of stomach aches, nausea or headaches, contact your child’s pediatrician.
Fight or Flight Response. When a child is feeling anxious, their fight or flight instincts might kick in. This means their brain is not letting them think rationally, so when a parent tries to rationalize the situation, the child feels like they aren’t being listened to. Instead, ask lots of questions about how they are feeling, and put some urgency in your voice, without sounding anxious yourself. This will show you get that they are worried, and will help them get back to a place where they can hear the logical things you have to say.
Give it a Name. Don’t talk about your child being afraid, because this makes it seem like something that they can’t fix. Give it a name, like the “worry bug.” For older kids or teens, just refer to it as the “worry that gets in the way.” Then you can work together to come up with ways to reduce it. This helps kids to control their emotions.
Get Connected. Spend more cuddle time with young children and spend more alone time with teenagers. Children feel safe and more secure when they feel deeply loved.
Set Limits. Kids are exposed to a lot of adults themes – and they are not socially or emotionally prepared to deal with these. Set limits on behaviour and the things you kids are exposed to. When kids see that parents don’t have control, they get nervous about who will take care of them and this aggravates anxiety. Turn off scary news reports on TV or hide frightening headlines.
Scaling. Get your kids to rate their anxiety and use deep breathing or positive imagery to bring the number down.
Calm Yourself. Sometimes children come by their anxiety honestly. Use the same techniques to make sure you are calm. Kids often gauge their responses based on ours.

Humour and Emotional Intelligence

marshajacobson — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 17:54:13 +0000

What does it mean to have a sense of humour and where does this fit into emotional intelligence? Many successful people have a twinkle in their eyes. They often are able to laugh good-naturedly with others and will often laugh at themselves. However, humour is one of those characteristics that so easily can turn from “feel good” to “feel bad.”There is a fine line between good-natured teasing and putting someone down, and between funny clever remarks and sarcasm. A person with a high emotional intelligence has the ability to know the difference. For those of us working on raising our emotional intelligence, how do we develop an emotionally intelligent sense of humour?

Laughing and smiling are essential to a full life. We do both when we are happy. Laughing is often a great release of emotion and triggers a release of chemicals in our brains that make us happier. Smiling is an instinct in humans. It is seen in children as young as 4 weeks old. Smiling and laughing are often infectious and can easily spread to other people. Laughing together can often feel very connecting and connecting with others is at the core of all relationships.

Many wonderful childhood memories are those that have occurred with humour. When a family laughs in a spirit of togetherness, the value of that connection is enormous. Laughter is a strong emotion and when a strong positive emotion is connected to an event in childhood, it is remembered. Connecting in a family with humour increases our emotional intelligence.

Possessing a good sense of humour is a by-product of having high emotional intelligence. The greatest sense of humour comes from kindness, which is a characteristic present in people with high emotional intelligence. A person with good empathy will know when it is appropriate to laugh.

Another common place that humour can often occur is when something unexpected happens. A person’s ability to laugh in situations like this is often related to how that person generally deals with the unexpected and how quickly they can adapt to seeing a situation in a new way. Self-understanding and knowing how to deal with feelings, yours and others, produce this lack of rigidity. Learning how to do this with humour is yet another characteristic of high emotional intelligence.

Everything that we ever learn as humans, from riding a bike to knowing when to laugh, grows with practice. There is a necessary period of self-consciousness before it feels natural and automatic. People who live a life of spontaneous joy have learned to live that way. They have all “worked” in some way on developing high emotional intelligence.

Along with many other characteristics of high emotional intelligence, we can and should teach children to use humour appropriately.

Book Review: Connected Parenting by Jennifer Kolari

marshajacobson — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 13:55:31 +0000

There are so many wonderful things about Jennifer Kolari‘s book “Connected Parenting” that I hardly know where to begin.

Kolari understands that even when parents feel despair, overwhelmed, angry or feel guilty because they no longer like their child, that these feelings are just a mask for fear and confusion. Kolari never blames parents who have lost their way and find themselves in a vortex of negativity. She understands, as a parent herself, how easily this can happen. Kolari’s book is about repairing and strengthening bonds between parent and child and between all relationships. It is not about learning to love our child but learning how to love our child so that they feel lovable.

Of course, children and parents begin their journey in different places but all can benefit from learning the techniques outlined in “Connected Parenting.” Kolari provides a wealth of information for general parenting as well as specific direction for parents of children with special needs. Kolari states that the Connected Parenting method is based on, “therapy techniques, not parenting techniques.” It’s important to know this because many times following her techniques feels like the opposite of what should be happening. A general rule of thumb for Kolari is that the times when we feel least like following her techniques are exactly the times when we should.

“Mirroring” is at the crux of Kolari’s method and is like empathy but much, much more. To mirror our child is to empathize in a way that makes them feel that we are listening and have truly understood their experience. We reflect this back to them and use their reactions as a guide for when we have done it right. Children who feel heard and understood also feel validated, safe and lovable. These children will also be more able to understand themselves and will feel more in control of their behavior and feelings. They will also find it easier to understand and accept boundaries.

Kolari refers to a child as feeling “lovable” as opposed to “loved.” This really speaks to her understanding of parents who have arrived at her doorstep not because they no longer love their child but because the parent-child relationship has “frayed” and the experience of love is lost behind the cloud of anxiety, anger and despair. The Connected Parenting method helps us find that love again.

Kolari has some wonderful analogies throughout her book that really help parents understand what she is saying. She says that children need to feel connected to their parents to feel loved and safe so that they can explore their world in a healthy way. We must be careful, however, to not smother our child nor give them too much slack. She uses rock climbing to explain this concept. “When you rock climb, you often have a partner on the ground who is wearing a harness with a rope. … The rope literally connects the climber to his or her partner on the ground, who, in effect, gives him enough slack to move upward. And because the climber trusts the partner and feels the safety of the tension on the rope, he will have the confidence to reach farther and climb higher because he knows he can’t fall. The tension needs to be just right – too much and the climber can’t move, too little and he can’t feel the tension.”

Kolari exudes “realness” both as a person and as a parent. She shares many personal stories about her own imperfect parenting but strongly believes that, “In the game of life you always get a second chance.” She encourages parents to revisit situations that they may have handled incorrectly and rewrite them. She teaches parents that there is no room in the journey of parenting for defensiveness and power struggles. She shows us in clear and often touching ways that loving your child in ways that they feel lovable is empowering to both child and parent.

I would highly recommend this book to anyone who wants to improve the quality of the relationship with their child.

Connected Parenting is available for purchase at amazon.ca, amazon.com, and other retailers.